Life Hacks for NEW Single Mamas

I’ve been thinking about my experience of doing this a lot lately. Sometimes I think back to those first days, after coming home from the hospital, and I’m amazed at how this entire experience has evolved and moved me, deeply, on so many levels. I was alone throughout the entirety of my pregnancy; lived by myself, went to most of my doctor’s appointments by myself, save for the few times I was joined by an acquaintance who offered to be present mostly out of pity for me (I think). Things were very emotional for me; it was the deep of autumn,…

Why Don’t Men Do Kindness More?

WARNING: Death and Highly Distressing Images (if you click on the US Uncut link below) Last week, I saw a US Uncut story about the recent strike on Syrian civilians (mostly children) that happened while the world was distracted by the US Republican Convention and the theatrical plagiarism of Donald Trump’s wife. As a friend of mine said recently, “If all you care about right now is plagiarism, you are part of the problem.” Mass Distraction. Artfully distracted we are. Too busy to care. Too preoccupied to notice. Too afraid of our own emotions to lift the veil of materialism and…

Interviews with Rad Single Moms (1.)

So – I decided to start conducting a series of structured qualitative interviews with other single moms who have done/are doing this #SingleMomLife and are doing really well. We all need sources of inspiration and I think this series is going to be very powerful in that regard. I’ve endeavoured to cover a variety of topics with each interviewee that explore things of concern to most of us in a deep, and very real, very now sense. My intention is to think about all of these interviews and their responses (including whatever discussion happens in the comments), and do follow-up blog…

Do Kids Hold Women Artists Back?

According to the artist, Marina Abramović, if a female artist has kids, she is not free and her career will be stunted. That is, she will be a failure and not succeed in the art world. Uhm… calling all successful female artists with children to stand up, please! (There are a LOT. If you are one, feel free to comment on this post as it’d be great to get some feedback from you on this.) Here’s what she said in her interview with Tagesspiegel: “The artist explained to the newspaper that she never wanted children, even at an early age. “I…

Joy

Yesterday, I read one of the best pieces of feminist writing on the experiences and Joys of Single Motherhood that I’ve seen in a while. Posted on The Girl God (awesome concept site featuring anthologies and other books about feminist spirituality) and written by Jennifer Kimmel, it is a beautiful transmutation of the challenges that single motherhood often holds for many of us. Kimmel’s strength and endurance are clear, breathing a fresh breath life and hope into our cause: “I suspect there are quite a few similar stories out there. Women and their children, breathing happy sighs of relief, moving about unburdened…

Structural Inequality: A Disturbance in the Force

Ok. Here is an article I found today that (I think) is a good example of the nuances in the experiences of single motherhood that can, if misunderstood or reacted to in haste, serve to divide the sisterhood rather than grow our ranks in solidarity (doing this and enduring for the last seven years. The undertone of her article really hones in on the exhaustion and isolating struggle that accompanies the experience of single motherhood for so many of us. Bradford is clearly annoyed by the attempts of rich white women to claim public stake in what is, for the vast majority…

Searching for a Community

I am not alone. I kept telling myself this, and was reminded of it thanks to a baby shower gift from a friend – a small clay pocket stone, thumbprint indenting it with the phrase ‘You are not alone’ stamped in the centre with aquamarine glaze. I sometimes carried it with me, but usually I just left it on my desk, hoping that it’d vibe up the energy in my domestic space, in my life, and in my heart. I am not sad. I was broken-hearted. But I am healing. I’m a white (privileged) able-bodied woman in my 30s, so…

A Coalition of Lionesses

Hi. I’m so glad you’ve found me. Us. Us. I am not alone. You are not alone either. Our singleness does not necessitate the mistakenly oft-obliged pity or social shame. GTFO with that. We have each other. Nobody tells you this though, when you’re pregnant and alone, or raising a small baby and alone, or caring for several children at the same time while working full-time and going to school, or looking back over the years and everything you did and wondering how in the hell you did it – without a partner or much other support. Ladies, I am here to tell…